Perrie – If He Wanted To He Would. Lyrics Meaning: Your Ultimate Wake-Up Call
Ever found yourself staring at your phone, rereading his last text from hours ago, and crafting a whole narrative in your head about why he hasn’t replied? “He’s probably just super busy at work,” or “Maybe his phone died,” or my personal favorite, “He’s just not a big texter.” We’ve all been there, bending over backward to make excuses for someone’s low-effort behavior, hoping that underneath the inconsistency lies the amazing person we think we see.
It’s an exhausting cycle of hope and disappointment, right? Well, what if I told you there’s a song that perfectly captures this feeling, shakes you by the shoulders, and delivers the cold, hard truth with the love of a best friend? Perrie just dropped a track that serves as a much-needed reality check for anyone tangled in a one-sided situationship. Get ready, because we’re about to dive deep into an anthem that’s basically a therapy session and a pep talk rolled into one.
The Friend We All Need: Unpacking Perrie’s “If He Wanted To He Would”
The song kicks off with a scene that’s painfully familiar. It’s not a dramatic movie opening; it’s real life. It’s your friend showing up at your door, heartbroken over the same guy, for the umpteenth time. Perrie sets the stage perfectly, painting a picture of a friend who’s seen this all before.
Come round to mine and tell me what’s been happenin’
You say it’s him, that’s not very surprisin’
Your eyes are red, I can tell you’ve been cryin’
You say you’re fine, but you’re lyin’
Right away, you feel the warmth and exasperation of the narrator. She’s not judging; she’s just… there. She knows her friend is hurting and trying to put on a brave face, but she sees right through it. This isn’t just a song; it’s the beginning of a crucial conversation that every person needs to have at some point.
The “Falling for Potential” Trap
Here’s where Perrie hits the nail on the head. She diagnoses the problem with pinpoint accuracy. It’s not about the guy being a monster; it’s about her friend being in love with who he could be, not who he actually is. And honestly, isn’t that a trap we all fall into?
And we’ve all been that girl, fallin’ for potential
But he can’t do the basics and that shit’s essential
That last line is everything. The “basics” aren’t complicated. We’re talking about consistent communication, making you feel valued, and showing up when it counts. It’s the essential groundwork of any healthy connection. Perrie points out that no matter how charming or exciting someone seems, if they can’t handle the fundamental stuff, the relationship is built on shaky ground. It’s a powerful reminder to stop building a fantasy and start looking at the facts.
The Brutal, Honest-to-God Truth
And then comes the chorus, the lyrical gut-punch that the entire song is built around. It’s the phrase that’s been floating around the internet for a while, but hearing Perrie sing it with such clarity and a hint of sass makes it land differently. It’s simple, direct, and leaves absolutely no room for excuses.
Flowers vs. A Call Back: The Bare Minimum Test
He’ll buy you flowers, but he won’t call you back
Ruin your life and then tell you, “Relax”
And, look, I get it if the sex is kinda good (So good)
This verse is a masterclass in dissecting mixed signals. He does something performative and sweet, like buying flowers, but fails at the simple, consistent act of communication. He creates chaos and then dismisses your feelings by telling you to “relax.” Perrie even acknowledges the one thing that often keeps people stuck: the physical connection. It’s such a real and honest admission! She’s not shaming anyone for it; she’s just saying, “I get it, but even that isn’t enough to justify this behavior.” The final line is the ultimate mic drop. It’s not about him being busy, forgetful, or complicated. It’s a simple matter of priority. If you were a priority, he would make the effort. Period.
He Needs Therapy, Not a Girlfriend
The second verse goes even deeper, shifting the focus from his actions to his motivations. The song suggests that this isn’t about the friend not being “good enough”; it’s about the guy not being emotionally available or self-aware.
His sense of vanity got you worried, you’re doing charity
Thinks he needs a lover, what he really needs is therapy
Wow. This is the moment the friend (and the listener) is absolved of responsibility. You’re not his project. You’re not his fixer. Trying to love someone who needs to work on themselves first is like “doing charity”—it’s a one-way street where you give everything and get very little in return. This lyric gives you permission to stop trying to heal someone else and to start focusing on your own well-being.
The beauty of “If He Wanted To He Would” lies in its unwavering message of self-worth, delivered through the lens of a fiercely loyal friend. The song isn’t about hating the guy; it’s about loving your friend—and yourself—enough to demand better. It’s a reminder that you deserve someone who can do the basics, who puts you first, and who doesn’t make you question your value. It’s an anthem for recognizing your worth and walking away from anything that doesn’t honor it.
Ultimately, this track is the friend holding up a mirror and telling you what you already know deep down but are too afraid to admit. It’s a loving, firm, and incredibly catchy wake-up call. But that’s just my take on it. What did you feel when you first heard this song? Does it resonate with any of your own experiences? Let’s chat about it below!